My World
Why we do it?
For those of us who are or were parents, do you remember the terrible two’s. I do as if it were still happening. Your child suddenly realized that he/she is an individual and can say no to you. If fact they begin to enjoy the saying of that very simple word. NO! NO! NO! Will it ever end? You think about it and decide that it may end but you aren’t sure. After a while and some loss of sanity you arrive at a truce.
You take a deep breath and say well I have survived it and boy I am going to think long and hard before I have another child again. Sure you will. Now the amazing thing about the terrible two’s is that it will repeat in a few years. You will keep your sanity this time, you have been here before. Not only does she say no but her vocabulary is such that she can say it with elegance. She has learned what buttons to push. Once again you begin to wonder am I going to make it. But you do. All is right with the world. You may even be thinking of having a second child. Yes you are. You are just thinking but you are having serious thoughts.
Finally you have that second child and you are so pleased. He is adorable. You cuddle him. You also get no sleep because he needs to be fed and, by the way, he doesn’t like it if you sleep through the night. You tell yourself, I have been here and can do it again. But just when he is entering the terrible two’s your daughter is becoming an adolescent.
Well adolescence is about the terrible two’s all over again. And this time you are dealing with a young person that can argue and win. You are not quite sure how it happened but they do win. Their ability to push buttons has reached a really subtle level that you really are not sure is happening, if you have time to think about it. And this time it won’t end in a few months, it may take a number of years. Now you are tired. Your nerves are sparking left and right. Once in awhile you find yourself siting a shaking. You find yourself losing your temper but if you are like me you don’t raise your voice or hit your child, don’t want to mess the child up for life. Oh yes there is that great invention, the time out. Well the time out is good and bad. For the child it isn’t so bad. These days they have music, TV, and friends to text. But for you the house is quite. You are comfortable. You may even think that you will keep her in her room forever. Again I had to reject that thought.
Now don’t get me wrong we loved our daughters. But we didn’t expect the perfect storm to enter our lives. Now for just a second I want to remind you of your two year old son. He is just a treat. NO! NO! NO! I don’t want to eat that. By the time he is 4 he is arguing about anything and every thing. Your older daughter is still going though adolescence and you are going out of your mind. Just a word of caution, parenting isn’t for sissies. It is hard work. Oh in twenty years you may be proud of what you accomplished, and you did accomplish it, but you have to get there first. The population of the United States is going down because people are having fewer children. Instead of two, three, or four, they are happy with one. I know the scientists say this is because people can’t afford so many children, but I believe it is an attempt at sanity. Remember what Einstein said, “if you do the same thing over and over and expect a different result you are insane.”
Perhaps we are taking control back. Perhaps we can be happy with just one child, boy or girl. Perhaps sleeping is a good thought and coming home from work doesn’t have to mean entering the arena.
Peace, howie
Categories: Life
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